Carnegie Hill Mom

Human beings are designed to do life together. Days feel infinitely more full and joyful when we share them with others. But it isn’t just moments of celebration that draw us close. It is the act of calling upon each other in times of desperation that truly knits us into a unit. When my mother’s health took a turn for the worse last month, I discovered anew how laying groundwork within relationships pays off. It is the solid foundation of forever friends and familial bonds that provides strength and support when we need it the most. In this season of gratitude, I feel especially thankful for the friends who cared for my husband and kids so I could take a few days off from mom life to focus on my role as a daughter and care for my ailing mother. My mom prides herself in being a strong, successful and independent woman. She has her life under as much control as possible—an immaculate home, thorough files, strategically-planned retirement and detailed travel itineraries. She had plans to ...

A year plus of pandemic turbulence has put friendships through the wringer. But the relationships that survive are pure gold. My daughter cheerfully returned to full-time, in-person school this fall only to discover that COVID had shattered her core group of three best friends. One girl’s family fled the city, the second missed the first several weeks of school while quarantining, and the third left for her original school—she had only joined us last year because our school offered some precious in-person days. As a result of this heart-wrenching, disorienting loss, my daughter kept bemoaning, “I don’t have any friends!” “Well, that’s not true,” I retorted, listing off the myriad playmates she runs around with on the playground at school pickup. “But those are Bethany and Kimberly’s friends,” Emily moped. Oh, the trials of being a middle child. Apparently her siblings’ buddies—while super fun—weren’t filling the void left behind from the loss of her close peers. And yet, for the ti...

  Are you among the throngs of travelers hitting the road this summer as cities open up after a year of Covid cramping your style? Grab some comfortable shoes, a bottle of sunscreen, and a boatload of trail mix and head northeast. New England’s rocky coastal views and wild nature will mix with quaint harbors and history to delight everyone in your family from the littlest legs to the most senior travelers. Here are some highlights to inspire your travel itinerary. These worked beautifully for my family: kids aged 4-8 as well as Mom, Dad and Grandma. Newport, Rhode Island 1.        Park at Narragansett Avenue to start at the 40 Steps and walk south past Gilded Age mansions like the Breakers, finishing this section of the Cliff Walk with some fun bolder leaping and views of Marble House across the inlet from Belmont Beach. This gives you the highlights of the cliffs without the complete 3.5 miles. You can also take a $2 trolley ride along Bellevu...

The sweltering summer I was pregnant with twins, I ventured into the uncharted territory of playgrounds. I had heard about a moms’ group that gathered at the park near the hospital where I would give birth.  Even though my babies were still buns in the oven, I couldn’t wait to plug into a network of ladies who knew a thing or two about raising kids in NYC. Without family nearby, that group became my lifeline. In true, pregnant-and-ready-to-burst style, I asked a gazillion questions. One mom still stands out in my memory nine years later. For one, she brought me the most delicious spaghetti and meatballs a week after my twins arrived. More vividly, though, I recall one morning in Central Park. She stationed herself in a shady area near the center of the playground, from which she could spot her toddler no matter which direction he wandered. She pointed out her son navigating a ladder. Suddenly, we noticed a wet spot appear and spread down his shorts. “We’re potty training,” she expl...

There’s a lie I tell myself that goes something like this: Resting is lazy. Taking a break is for the weak. Stay-at-home moms love motherhood, so we don’t need time off. Thanks to this lie, I feel guilty for taking even a moment to pause. Hence, I immediately clear my empty lunch plate instead of lingering over the rest of a magazine article. I quickly set down my phone when the kids come over or start doing sit-ups when my husband walks in on my nap. I snap out of a daydream and instead plan out meals for the week. After all, down time isn’t compatible with my lie. And yet, I know that making time for regular rest is an essential rhythm for a joyful, sustainable life. Therefore, I’ve been experimenting recently with what it could look like to keep a weekly sabbath—a day off from work (including the unpaid kind that defines  life as a mom  of four young kids). I realize full well that parents can’t just take 24 hours off from mom and dad duties. But there is definitely room fo...